Photo Book - All About Dad

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Photo Book - Sept 2012 - March 2013 Adventures

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The Tribute I Gave to My Dad at His Celebration

MY TRIBUTE TO MY DAD:

Those of you have known me since I was a little girl, know how rare and special my connection is to my dad and how much I looked up to my dad.  I had a lot of one-on-one time with my dad…maybe because Geoff and I are over six years apart.  I remember he would come home from work and he had barely put down his briefcase before I asked him to take me out.  He would often take me to the local drug store and we would hang out at the magazine/book section OR he would take me out for ice cream at Big Scoop.  There was not much spoken except for the odd joke, but we simply enjoyed hanging out together.  He was an example to me on how we should live and treat people.  Here are some:

1.       BE NON-JUDGEMENTAL and TREAT EVERYONE THE SAME:  He always told me to understand the other person’s P.O.V or life history, if they were hurtful, there must be a reason why that person did what they did.  Dad never judged anyone.  I would try to set him up to say anything bad about anyone.  But nope, he never said one bad thing about a single person.

2.       BE GENEROUS:  We all know about his generosity.  Many people are generous but rarely do you find someone so generous that it actually cost that person something.   When he did pro bono work, the disbursement fees still came out of his own pocket.  We would get paid with blueberries, tofu, a drum set and so many other things.   My dad didn’t just give what he had excess of, he gave everything he had.  Geoff would often tell me that if it weren’t for mom, we would be lining up at the food bank.  Growing up, Mom, dad, Geoff and I would be out for dinner and my dad would see one person at another table that he knew (he may not have known the other people) and he would pay their bill.   Another example was when I was fundraising; I would be the top seller because my dad bought all my boxes of Entertainment Books and then he would give them away to his friends or clients.

3.       BE KIND TO THE POOR:  Dad was compassionate to the poor & needy street people.  And it goes back to him telling me to understand where that person came from.  They didn’t just end up on the street.  Dad used to organize his wallet a certain way.  He had his secret stash of cash.  And then cash that was more easily accessible so that he could give it to someone in need.

4.       BE A SOFTIE:  My dad never yelled or raised his voice to me.  NEVER.  I was his “sugar”.  When my mom would spank me and send me to my room, I would call dad at work crying (I always had direct access), “Mommy spanked me!”  “Why, sugar?”  “I don’t know.  She just did.”  Then I would hang up.  Seconds later, the phone would ring, and after mom picked up the phone, I secretly listened to Dad get after mom for spanking me.  This would happen a couple more times until mom figured it out, then she’d say after spanking me, “Now, don’t  call your dad!”  But I still called!

5.       DON’T LET YOUR HANDICAP HINDER YOU:  It never crossed my mind that my dad was handicap.  He still taught me how to tie my shoes, how to ride a bike, how to make the washing machine overflow, how to take things apart but not know how to put things back together, how to throw & catch a baseball with the same hand (making me not so competent in that sport).

6.       MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH OR SMILE:  Dad was a jokester no doubt.  Whoopie cushions, goofy glasses, magic tricks, gag gifts, one-liners, jokes (some not so clean) were plenty in our house especially when we had Uncle Robert & Auntie Leslie Kent, or Norman Wong or Walt Lim around.  Quite a few times during my acne teenage years, he would sing, “The First Time Ever I saw your Face.  Ahhhhhhh”.  Being self-conscious about my complexion, I didn’t like that but that was my dad for ever joking around.  We laughed A LOT with dad.

 These are just some of the lessons my dad taught me, and which I am still learning. 

One thing that I had wished…that my kids, Jaclyn & Madison, knew my dad in his heyday…in the last couple of years, dad had been quiet and less engaged…but somehow my kids still sensed his goodness, his playful spirit, and most of all, that he loved them and they loved him back.

My dad loved ME so well, so unconditionally.  How blessed am I to experience a love like that in my lifetime.  No person has ever loved me more or better than my dad.  No one.  And I miss him soooooooo much.  But Heaven now has a treasure that makes it an even more special place.

Dad's Celebration of Life on YouTube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7EsHe9BfVw

A Life Well-Lived

Jack Lee passed away peacefully on April 2, 2013 at the age of 82.  He will always be alive in the happy memories of his loving family: wife Mamie; son Geoffrey; daughter Deanna (Michael Woo); grandchildren, Jaclyn & Madison; brothers Bob (Lily) & Bill (Mirian), sisters Maye Louie & Mary (Normie Kwong), sister-in-law Rhoda; nieces & nephews.  Predeceased by brother George, sister Vera (George Wong), brother-in-law Willis Louie. Jack Lee was born on February 19, 1931 in Vancouver, BC to Ron Bick Lee & King Choon Chan.   He and his six siblings grew up in the Vancouver Chinatown area, and then in Shaughnessy.  Jack attended Model School and King Edward High School.  He graduated from the University of British Columbia with degrees in Commerce (1955) and Law (1962).   His law practice thrived in Chinatown, focusing mostly on real estate law, until he retired in 2008. Jack married Mamie Mah from Edmonton, AB on August 26, 1959.  They celebrated 54 years together, have two children, Geoffrey and Deanna .  Through the years, Jack and Mamie loved to entertain, and welcomed their large extended family and many friends & acquaintances to their home. Jack enjoyed many years of leadership, community service and volunteer work, a lifestyle modelled by his centenarian father. He was involved with many organizations in the Chinese Community such as the Vancouver Chinatown Lions Club, the Lee's Association, the Chinese Benevolent Association, the Toisan Benevolent Society, the Chinese Social Development Society and the Vancouver Chinese Public School.  He was also very active in all levels of Canadian politics. Jack was a recipient of the Silver Medallion Award from the Canadian government for outstanding community service, and was an active member of the Lions Club for many years. He was named a Melvin Jones Fellow in 2002 which is the highest form of recognition conferred by the Lions Club International Foundation.  Jack was appointed to the B.C. Police Commission in 1995 and also by the B.C. government to serve on the Board of Directors at Mount St. Joseph Hospital in Vancouver.  Dad was not about achievements, accomplishments or recognition.  He simply served and gave to the community because of his compassion and love for all people.  Dad treated everyone well, and the same, and he never took credit for anything.  He stood firm in his principles, never compromising on what he thought was right. Dad was a gifted public speaker and was the Master of Ceremony at many functions such as weddings, memorials, fundraisers and beauty pageants.  His quick wit, clever one-liners, love of a great joke and sense of humour made him the life of the party.  People would often find him behind a video camera capturing special events or just ordinary moments.   After spending days editing, he would give the videotapes to his friends. Dad was always thoughtful and unconditionally generous to family, friends and strangers alike - especially to children.  He had a tender heart for kids and would go out of his way to make trips to the local store so that he would have sweet treats and toys on hand for them.  Dad was also quite the artist; he loved to draw caricatures of his family. Dad loved documentaries about wildlife animals, the two World Wars, and the Golden Era of Hollywood.  He enjoyed watching Dean Martin, The Honeymooners and All In The Family.  He tapped his toes to Big Band music, Glenn Miller, Tommy Dorsey, Frank Sinatra and such.  Dad had a sweet tooth too, especially for anything chocolate. In Dad’s retirement years, he went for daily walks (often involuntarily) with Alex Louie and brother, Bill.  Saturday morning coffee with the gang at Burger King was always a highlight of the week for him.  He attended a weekly Bible study, where he eventually became receptive to the truths of the Bible.   His biggest smiles were reserved for his grandchildren, Jaclyn and Madison – daughters of Deanna and his son-in-law, Dr. Michael Woo, who visited often.  Jaclyn and Madison were “Gung Gung’s” pride and joy! Dad will always live in our hearts, and in the fun and happy memories of his loving family, friends and community. He leaves us with a tremendous legacy of living life fully and sacrificially helping others.

My Dad and My Delay in Writing About Him

I have not written in this blog in months.  It seems like the last few entries have been about close family members that have passed on - Auntie Vera, Uncle George and Uncle Willis.  So I now associate my blog with death notices.

Well, I have another one to add.  My DAD.  And unlike the other entries where I expressed my emotions immediately "to pen"...I have waited for over 2 months to talk about my dad.  To include him in this blog is another confirmation that he is gone.

My dad passed away on the sunny day of Tuesday, April 2nd at 2:05pm in his wheelchair, in his room at South Granville Park Lodge.,

Dad was not alone.  He was with his dedicated caregiver, Jimmy Zhao.  Apparently, they had been watching Blackbeard's Ghost on TV.  Dad was clear-minded enough to comment that "that guy is bad".  Then Dad looked up to the corner of the ceiling and said, "What's that?" and then in a twinkling of an eye, .his heart stopped and he left.

During that time, I was at home at the computer working on this and that, even got in a few phone calls.  The last call was with Roddy.  I had even told him that Dad was getting better, "a new baseline".  I had received a call on my cell but didn't answer it.  After I got off the call with Roddy around 3:20pm, I retrieved my message.  It was from cousin Randy.  His message was a message of condolences!  WHAT?!  I called him back.  It was a stressful call as you can imagine.  I then called Michael at work, and I could tell by his voice that he knew and I forced him to tell me.  Then he said, "Your dad passed away."  I screamed and I screamed loud and I screamed "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Then I called Geoff who acted calmly on the phone.  I told him I knew and that I was upset that I had to find out from Randy's message and 90 minutes after Dad died.  What's with that?

When Michael got home, we packed, then picked up the girls at Bethany's.  They asked many times as to why we were leaving for Vancouver but we didn't tell them until we made a food stop at the Costco in Burlington.

For the next two weeks after that, we were busy preparing for Dad's Celebration of Life.  Geoff and I just naturally fell into what our strengths are.  I was to organize the church service, gather the family of workers, and all the little details that go into planning (program, speakers, flowers, songs, white envelopes, obituary, etc).  Geoff was to organize the reception, coordinate details of the funeral home and cemetery.  I said it was like planning a big wedding except we only have a week to put it together.

Jaclyn and Madison were great.  That first weekend, Michael strongly encouraged me to go back home for a couple of days.  I was upset but relented.  And in hindsight, it was a good idea.  The girls, all of us, were able to decompress.  And we had fun laughing at episodes of "I Love Lucy".

This is all I will share for now.  I will also post the obit I wrote and include the YouTube link of Dad's wonderful service.