blogging July car accident

 On July 20th just after I dropped Madison off at Perrigo Park for a soccer practice, I drove down 95th towards Avondale.  It was minutes before 4pm.  When it was clear to proceed, I turned right onto Avondale into the curbside lane.  A lady sideswiped me changing lanes from the inside lane.  The whole left side of my car damaged.  When we pulled over to assess the damages, busy taking photos with our cells, I broke the ice and said to her, "So I guess you didn't see me?"  Her reply was, "I checked twice and you weren't there.  You must have been speeding."  I said, "I don't know how I can be speeding in this traffic."

Anyways, by 4:30pm, I reported the accident to my car insurance.  And then wrote an online police report.  By the next morning, the case was resolved.  The other driver was 100% liable.

I started feeling discomfort the next day.  Sore neck and shoulder.  Some left knee discomfort too.  I started visiting David Bourree, my chiropractor with regular visits.  Since that initial visit, he did an xray, regular laser therapy and adjustments.  I would regularly ice my knee. 

In early August, we went on a family trip to Whistler.  I spent most of the time with the kids and Gilbert.  We went on a few scenic walks.  Each time after the walks, I felt some discomfort with my knee and would just ice it.  After the last long walk, that was it.  My knee was doomed.  And since then my knee was presented some challenges.  Tightness, pain, locked, unable to fully extend.  I have had difficulty getting in and out of shower, in and out of car, walking down stairs, or have to pause when standing after a long time of sitting.  When walking down stairs, I had to walk one step at a time with the left foot first.  For some reason, if I led with the right foot, it was painful.  Or another easier way to walk down was to go backwards!

Dr. Bourree suggested I go to Reflex Knee Specialist where I had an xray and ultrasound.  Nothing serious was presented.  Some meniscus issues and some arthritis.  

I have also had 3 massage treatments with Alissa Dalke, and that seems to help.  Because I have been limping for so long, my right hip was started to hurt from compensating.

Now we are into early September (today is Sep 10).  My knee is better but not 100%.  I don't have to ice it as much and my limping is less obvious.  I saw Mike Lewis, a PT with Washington Physical Therapy, yesterday, and he gave me some exercises to help work on my knee and left elbow.  Yes, now my left elbow is locked and can't fully extend.  That started last week some time.  It has been painful to shampoo and blow dry my hair.    

A new thing that started two days ago is sharp pain/twinges on my inner thighs, especially on the right side.  Not sure what that is about.  It would just twinge with the smallest movement. 

Because of this car accident, I had to cancel our annual end of July waterskiing trip to Stella Blue and some other shorter adventures.  It's a good thing my girls were able to pick up more work shifts - Jaclyn at Deru and Madison at Trader Joe's - to keep their summer busy.

Queen Elizabeth II has died at the age of 96 at Balmoral

Queen Elizabeth passed away on Thursday Sep 8th.  Just two days prior she appointed the new prime minister of Britain.  Right until the end she continued to serve her country. 

It's the end of an era.  The only queen so many of us have known.  King Charles III ascends to the throne.  

How do I sum up 4 years?

 Oh geez.  It's been almost 4 years since I have entered anything in here.  LOTS has happened, obviously.  Firstly, we had or are in a pandemic.  Imagine that.  Covid-19 hit the world in late 2019 in Wuhan China but the first reported case in the US was right here in Washington in January 2020.  Patient zero, he was called.  There was also a horrible outbreak (& deaths) in a Kirkland Senior Home in Feb 2020 - the first US death.  National news was upon quiet little Kirkland.

Words that come to mind when I think of Covid:  Coronavirus, quarantines, lockdowns, closed borders, vaccination debates,  Moderna, Pfizer, anti-vaxxers, mask-wearing, anti-maskers, supply chain shortages, worker shortages, work-from-home, isolation, school at home, remote, loneliness, mental health issues, PCR tests, empty shelves in stores (no toilet paper to be seen), George Floyd riots, Black Lives Matter, social distancing, 6 ft apart, nature returns, no traffic, social pods & bubbles, Zoom gatherings.

Borders closed in mid-March of 2020 and didn't reopen to Canadians until July 2021.  The last time I was in Vancouver before the borders closed was for Uncle Bob's Celebration of Life.  He passed away on Feb 19th (dad's birthday) and his service was the 1st weekend of March.  Then the borders closed almost right after that weekend.  And almost without notice, school went remote.  

Mrs Tennis continued to teach Madison's 8th grade class and did a stellar job.  It was her final hurrah as she was retiring.  From what I heard from everyone else in public school, not much learning was happening during that time.  Teachers didn't even know what to do.

With the borders closed, that was the longest time away from home.  I saw my mom, brother & my in-laws twice during the time when we found a loophole and were able to meet at Peace Arch State Park.  I saw them around Canadian Thanksgiving Oct 2020 and then around Mother's Day of May 2021.  

Uncle Hong passed away on June 25, 2020.  He hadn't been feeling well, he also had lung cancer which was diagnosed late 2018.  He went to the hospital a couple of times.  We were able to Facetime him the day before.  He was in good spirits.  We joked around.  Teased him about the cute nurses.  We prayed at the end.  I did not think that that would be the last time I would see him.  He seemed so good.  We miss him terribly.  He had such a big positive influence in our family.  He was not part of our extended family.  He was part of our nucleus.  

Madison spent her last months of Stella Schola middle school and most of her 1st year of Juanita high school (Cambridge Program) doing school remote.  Madison was one of the valedictorians in 8th grade.  Did her speech...virtually.  

Jaclyn spent her last months of 10th grade at Inglemoor HS and most of her 11th grade remote.  Traffic was quiet.  Everyone was mandated to stay at home.  We were able to do house projects.  If soccer wasn't halted, the kids had to practice in pods.  Those soccer practices were the only times my kids ventured out of the house.  There were no games, no contact.  Practicing soccer 6 feet apart.

Michael even worked at home - doing telehealth.  Then when he did start to see patients in person, he only saw them on Tuesdays and Fridays, and that was for more than a year.  Now he is almost back to full-time.  

And now in 2022, Jaclyn graduated from Inglemoor High School in the International Bacc Program.  She graduated as salutatorian which is 2nd place since she didn't graduate with a 4.0.  She graduated 3.9947!  And now in a couple short weeks, she will be heading to University of Washington Foster School of Business.

When she was in 11th grade, she & her partner Nicole, came in 3rd in International DECA...which was done virtually...in the category of Team Entrepreneurship.  I didn't realize what an accomplishment that was until I chaperoned her school when they went to International DECA in 12th grade in Atlanta in April 2022.  It was a HUGE turnout - probably 14,000 competitors from all over North America.  She didn't make the final cut that time but it was still a huge accomplishment.  When we got back from Atlanta, we both got Covid.  Probably Omicron because our symptoms were minimal.  I think the worst sympton I had was a runny nose on the 3rd day of my quarantine.  Jaclyn lost her voice.  Madison also got it but I think she got it from school.  Her symptoms were more severe with cold & flu-like symptoms.  She still played soccer because her home test showed negative (but later her PCR came positive.

In 2020, we were still able to do some activities or family getaways.  One memorable trip was a river rafting in Oregon with the Ollis family.  We did our best to self-isolate for 2 weeks prior to the trip so that we could travel with everyone without masks.  We each had our own rafts, ate our own food (not shared).  Then right after that trip, we headed to Stella Blue Lake for waterskiing with the Wrights.  So much fun.

In 2021, with everything quiet, with not many people travelling, we made some wonderful family trips.  We went to Maui in February.  Used timeshare points and found a great location by the beach.  Jaclyn got an abscess in her ear so that limited some water activities.  But it was still a great trip.  Madison was able to do school remote (but had to wake up super early to attend).  Our 2nd trip was in April - we stayed at Kerry's place in Vegas and then headed to Utah to Bryce Canyon & Zion National Park.  That was amazing.  Bryce is a beautiful National Park.  Fun activities in Vegas were family massage, escape rooms, go-carting at Pole Position.   We also did another trip to Stella Blue Lake in July 2021 for some great waterskiing and fellowship.

At the end of April 2021, kids returned to school in person but with strict safety protocols.  Life slowly returned to normal...or now we are in a new normal.  (We can not go back to the way life was before.)

Lots of jumping around trying to sum up 4 years.  I didn't even touch 2019.  What was life like before Covid?

Oh, here is something from 2019, we got a rabbit named Charlie.  Jim wanted us to rabbit-sit for him in Oct 2019 for 2 weeks.  I didn't want to, at first, but then Madison said she wanted to to.  I ended up doing most of the caring and cleaning.  Jim came back from his 2-week trip from Norway only to find his Point Roberts place flooded while he was away.  So back comes Charlie (we missed him anyways).  It's literally impossible to get work done in Point Roberts.  Workers & supplies have to come from the US, not Canada.  And then Covid hit so forget any work geting done on Jim's house.  And we still had Charlie.  After 4+ months, I admitted he was ours to keep and moved him from the basement to the main floor.   So what was supposed to be a 2-week rabbit sitting gig is now almost coming up 3 years. Charlie has been a great Covid pet.  He pretty much takes over the whole upstairs now (except the kitchen) hopping around like he owns the place.  That little 3+ lb fellow owns us.  

Tierras de Vida means "Lands of Life"

I had an incredible evening last night at the Tierras de Vida Annual Gala (Agros International fundraiser).  Rick Steves as the Keynote Speaker.  I love Rick Steves and used his travel guide when we went to Europe in 2016.

Some of the things he said were: "When we travel, we get out of our ethnocentricity. Travel makes us wiser. We humanize people who are far away, and have empathy & compassion for them.  Travel helps us understand other people's baggage (not just focus on our own). We have the American Dream; other countries have their own dream."

On understanding baggage, he said, "We do things that are not who we are because of 9-11. We have the president that we have now because of 9-11."

And here is a hard one to swallow: "We, the rich, work from a mindset of scarcity. And yet, they, who are poor, work from a mindset of abundance. Why is that?"

Speak with Purpose

My friend gave me her ticket to the Seattle Women's Show.  At first, I didn't feel going especially since I wouldn't know anyone.  But since my friend kept saying, "if you are not going to use the ticket, let me know"...and I didn't want to waste it.  So I went.

Surprisingly, I had a good time.  There were lots of booths with small businesses, and some interesting break-out sessions.

This one break-out session at the end of the day, was just me and the speaker.  So I had 1:1 time with her, and it ended up being the most meaningful.  She asked me
1) right now I need ____________
2) today I am ____________
3) tomorrow I will be ____________
and 4) when I see myself in the future I am ________

And with those 4 fill-ins that opened the door for very authentic conversation.
My 4 answers were purpose, alone, busy, and ???

So she dove right in to the purpose answer.

Some tidbits from her were:
Whoever creates the narrative tells the story.
I need to control my narrative.
I need to know how I see myself, and to seek & desire purpose.
I need to take baby steps to manifest that.
Who I am helps me see my future self.
I need to groom myself to meet my future self.  Be intentional.
I need to understand who has packed my baggage (airport analogy), and to travel as lightly as possible.

All these nuggets were "wow" to me. 

I am sure she was expecting more than just me to show up to her talk.  But I sure I am glad that I got this personal time with her.  She was inspiring.  She challenged me to speak the naked truth, to let my guard down and be authentic.

No Rest for the Weary

Conversation with kids today:

Me: "Take a rest."  (J's ankle has been hurting from soccer and we were kicking around the ball.)

J: "Rest? There is no rest. Rest is homework. It's eat, sleep and lots of homework. And repeat."

Me: "What about your sister?"

J: "Soccer soccer soccer. I Love Lucy. Fool around. And a little bit of homework. Eat and sleep. More sleep than me. Repeat."

M: "NO! I have to do an hour and a half of Aleks."

J: "That's an hour and a half A WEEK." then calculates in her head..."That's 13 minutes a day! I would love 13 minutes a day of homework, even an hour and a half per day! And I would love to get as much sleep as you."

There seems to be an inbalance of homework between schools. That's quite apparent.

I am NOT Jesus

On Saturday, for St. Patrick's Day, I made corned beef in the crockpot.  I was told later in the day that my dish was the main meat dish for a party of 15 (dinner was at the Tipp's). Worried that it wasn't enough, I said to my kids, "Oh well, Jesus fed 5000 with 2 fish and 5 loaves. I should be able to feed 15!"  Jaclyn's reply was "You're not Jesus!"  So there it is. I am not Jesus.

Great Conversations

I took Madison to a puberty class called "Great Conversations" last week.  It was 2, 2-hour, evenings.  Madison squirmed and squirmed, told me it was the worst class ever.

On night 1, she was surprised that a "pad" was for the TOTM.  All these years, she thought it was a pantiliner. 

On night 2, she was quite surprised about the mechanics of baby-making.  I thought she knew already.  But clearly not.  Her response was "What?  The guy shoves it up..."  Oh boy. 

I think the kid is traumatized. 

From the 1900's

Madison played badminton for Kamiakin, her middle school. She and her partner Lucy had been kicking butt and they played and practiced against the Gr 8 varsity players. Last month, we asked her about her school athletic shirts...
 Me:  "Madison, your badminton shirt is pretty nice, do you get to keep them after the season?"
Madison:  "No, I don't like it as much. The other girls got new shirts and I got the old leftover shirts."
 Me:  "Well, it looks pretty good, what's wrong with them...?"
Madison:  "The coach brought an old box from their storage. I think it was back from the 1900s or something. I think it he said 1996!"

I killed myself laughing. My stomach hurt so bad from laughing so much. And she didn't get it. She said, "I know. 1900's!!!"

She couldn't figure out why Michael and I were laughing so much....oh, the kids these days!

 

A precious quote from 7 years ago

Madison to me: "I just love you so much, momma. I love you ten, 100, 100 million, all the way up to God, and then all the way to Pluto. Is that a lot? Actually, I love you more than that."

Toddlers are dogs. Teenagers are cats.

“I just realized that while children are dogs—loyal and affectionate—teenagers are cats.

It’s so easy to be a dog owner. You feed it, train it, boss it around. It puts its head on your knee and gazes at you as if you were a Rembrandt painting. It bounds indoors with enthusiasm when you call it.
Then, around age 13, your adoring puppy turns into a big old cat. When you tell it to come inside, it looks amazed, as if wondering who died and made you emperor.
Instead of dogging your footsteps, it disappears. You won’t see it again until it gets hungry…then it pauses on its sprint through the kitchen long enough to turn up its nose at whatever you’re serving, swishing its tail and giving you an aggrieved look until you break out the tuna again.
When you reach out to ruffle its head in that old affectionate gesture, it twists away from you, then gives you a blank stare as if it is trying to remember where it has seen you before.
You, not realizing your dog is now a cat, think something must be desperately wrong with it. It seems so antisocial, so distant, sort of depressed. It won’t go on family outings. Since you’re the one who raised it, taught it to fetch, stay and sit on command, you assume you did something wrong. Flooded with guilt and fear, you redouble your efforts to make your pet behave.
Only now you’re dealing with a cat, so everything that worked before now has the opposite result. Call it, and it runs away. Tell it to sit, and it jumps on the counter. The more you go toward it, wringing your hands, the more it moves away.
Instead of continuing to act like a dog owner, you must learn to behave like a cat owner. Put a dish of food near the door and let it come to you. But remember that a cat needs your help and affection too. Sit still and it will come, seeking that warm, comforting lap it has not entirely forgotten. Be there to open the door for it.
One day your grown up child will walk into the kitchen, give you a big kiss and say,
“You’ve been on your feet all day. Let me get those dishes for you.” Then, you’ll realize your cat is a dog again.”

The 4 Words That Defeat Worry

I was reflecting on Philippians 4:6-7 this morning.  It reminds me of the last time I saw my Uncle Willis at Crofton Manor on Saturday, April 28, 2012.  Stephen was there, and then Auntie Maye came later.

This is what I shared with Uncle Willis...

You know we all know the Phil 4:6-7 verse about "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer & petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."

Uncle Willis exclaimed, "CLAIM IT".

Ah, but, Uncle Willis, do you know what the 4 words are BEFORE that verse?  (I thought I would stump Uncle Bill when I asked him that question, but he got it.)  How about you?  Do you know the 4 words at the end of verse 5?

...drumroll, please...

It is "THE LORD IS NEAR."

I told Uncle Willis that we should start that popular verse with "THE LORD IS NEAR...Do not be anxious..."  By saying that the Lord is near, it takes us out of the equation because it is not our action to not be anxious.  But rather, we are not to be anxious because the Lord is near.  So when Uncle Willis is not well (stage 4 lung cancer), the Lord is near.  When my husband and I don't see eye to eye, the Lord is near.  When my kids drive me nuts, the Lord is near.  When I miss Auntie Vera, the Lord is near.  When I think of my dad and his challenges (and my mom who has to clean up after him), the Lord is near.  THE LORD IS NEAR.
Uncle Willis said that he learnt from me, and yes, that he would dwell on the words that THE LORD IS NEAR.  I am inspired by his positive spirit, and I know that comes from Christ within him.   

That would be the last time I saw my Uncle Willis.  He passed away August 23, 2012.

Normie Kwong state memorial

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZiGWexz124

Normie Kwong clipped barriers - first Chinese Canadian football player

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4lsZ8MbLC8&sns=em

Youtube video.  Love hearing Uncle Normie's voice.

"Living Legend" was My Uncle.

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/calgary/norman-kwong-dies-1.3747346

It's been just over a year since Uncle Normie passed away.  More and more of the Lee family are slipping away.  And this saddens me.  Yet, what a special and significant influence all of my aunts, uncles, parents and grandparents have had on me.  They have each made me who I am today.

Uncle Normie was special.  He was super funny, always teasing me.  And yet he had a quiet-nature to him.  While he was well-known and famous, he had a "homebody" nature to him. He was content staying at home, watching TV, baking bread and being a devoted family man. 

We would go to restaurants, and people would approach him all the time.  And he would always greet his fans cordially.  Must have been overwhelming for him, especially someone reserved by nature.  

People would say, and still say today, I come from "royalty".  Or "you're like the Kennedy family but in Canada" because there are so many successful, community-oriented family members of the Lee Clan. 

But to me, my family is my family.  My Uncle Norm was just my uncle.  Football fame was long before I came in the picture.  Uncle Normie never flaunted his fame (he didn't have to).  He never gave the impression that he was better than anyone else.  He was simply someone who worked hard, even with the prejudices he encountered, and succeeded in the process.  He had a blessed and fulfilled life. 

My kids never knew him in his heyday.  They just knew him as a "great uncle".  They realized the influence he had on Alberta when they attended his "state funeral".  We were driven in limousines with police escorting us on motorcycles.  Streets and highways were barricaded for our caravan of limousines.  One of my "nieces" said she felt like a rockstar.

Speakers at the service included the current Lieutenant Governor of Alberta, the Premier of Alberta, Former Prime Minister of Canada Stephen Harper, Wally Buono (football coach), Jim Peplinski (former hockey player).  My cousin, Brian, was the emcee.  I read Psalm 23.  My cousin, Peter, gave the message.  It was quite the event.  What an experience for my kids.  What an honour I had to be his "favourite niece"!!!!

What I have learned from Uncle Normie is that family comes first.  That is what stands out most to me.  Secondly, dreams can come true if you work hard and overcome your obstacles.  Thirdly, greet everyone warmly, kindly and with lots of humour. 

Miss you, Uncle Norm.  You will always be my "Living Legend".