The Tribute I Gave to My Dad at His Celebration

MY TRIBUTE TO MY DAD:

Those of you have known me since I was a little girl, know how rare and special my connection is to my dad and how much I looked up to my dad.  I had a lot of one-on-one time with my dad…maybe because Geoff and I are over six years apart.  I remember he would come home from work and he had barely put down his briefcase before I asked him to take me out.  He would often take me to the local drug store and we would hang out at the magazine/book section OR he would take me out for ice cream at Big Scoop.  There was not much spoken except for the odd joke, but we simply enjoyed hanging out together.  He was an example to me on how we should live and treat people.  Here are some:

1.       BE NON-JUDGEMENTAL and TREAT EVERYONE THE SAME:  He always told me to understand the other person’s P.O.V or life history, if they were hurtful, there must be a reason why that person did what they did.  Dad never judged anyone.  I would try to set him up to say anything bad about anyone.  But nope, he never said one bad thing about a single person.

2.       BE GENEROUS:  We all know about his generosity.  Many people are generous but rarely do you find someone so generous that it actually cost that person something.   When he did pro bono work, the disbursement fees still came out of his own pocket.  We would get paid with blueberries, tofu, a drum set and so many other things.   My dad didn’t just give what he had excess of, he gave everything he had.  Geoff would often tell me that if it weren’t for mom, we would be lining up at the food bank.  Growing up, Mom, dad, Geoff and I would be out for dinner and my dad would see one person at another table that he knew (he may not have known the other people) and he would pay their bill.   Another example was when I was fundraising; I would be the top seller because my dad bought all my boxes of Entertainment Books and then he would give them away to his friends or clients.

3.       BE KIND TO THE POOR:  Dad was compassionate to the poor & needy street people.  And it goes back to him telling me to understand where that person came from.  They didn’t just end up on the street.  Dad used to organize his wallet a certain way.  He had his secret stash of cash.  And then cash that was more easily accessible so that he could give it to someone in need.

4.       BE A SOFTIE:  My dad never yelled or raised his voice to me.  NEVER.  I was his “sugar”.  When my mom would spank me and send me to my room, I would call dad at work crying (I always had direct access), “Mommy spanked me!”  “Why, sugar?”  “I don’t know.  She just did.”  Then I would hang up.  Seconds later, the phone would ring, and after mom picked up the phone, I secretly listened to Dad get after mom for spanking me.  This would happen a couple more times until mom figured it out, then she’d say after spanking me, “Now, don’t  call your dad!”  But I still called!

5.       DON’T LET YOUR HANDICAP HINDER YOU:  It never crossed my mind that my dad was handicap.  He still taught me how to tie my shoes, how to ride a bike, how to make the washing machine overflow, how to take things apart but not know how to put things back together, how to throw & catch a baseball with the same hand (making me not so competent in that sport).

6.       MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH OR SMILE:  Dad was a jokester no doubt.  Whoopie cushions, goofy glasses, magic tricks, gag gifts, one-liners, jokes (some not so clean) were plenty in our house especially when we had Uncle Robert & Auntie Leslie Kent, or Norman Wong or Walt Lim around.  Quite a few times during my acne teenage years, he would sing, “The First Time Ever I saw your Face.  Ahhhhhhh”.  Being self-conscious about my complexion, I didn’t like that but that was my dad for ever joking around.  We laughed A LOT with dad.

 These are just some of the lessons my dad taught me, and which I am still learning. 

One thing that I had wished…that my kids, Jaclyn & Madison, knew my dad in his heyday…in the last couple of years, dad had been quiet and less engaged…but somehow my kids still sensed his goodness, his playful spirit, and most of all, that he loved them and they loved him back.

My dad loved ME so well, so unconditionally.  How blessed am I to experience a love like that in my lifetime.  No person has ever loved me more or better than my dad.  No one.  And I miss him soooooooo much.  But Heaven now has a treasure that makes it an even more special place.